Sunday, April 30, 2006

the da vinci code part 2: "How do we know what is really true?" - sermon and discussion notes

before the da vinci code discussion, jim discussed with the kids the merits of tying up your shoes, so that as messengers of the good news, we don't trip over our beautiful feet.

after the children went off to sunday school, jim recapped last week's first part on the da vinci code. he concluded that if the major premise of the da vinci code is not the truth, what is the truth? what are the authentic stories? why do we believe what we do believe?

recalling the words of god in isaiah, jim posits that the world is most likely to acknowledge the truth in the fruit it bears.

jim asked us what word or words do we think most people would associate with the word "bible?" people suggested:
  • thumper
  • old book
  • christian
  • rules
  • fear
  • stories for children
  • church
  • i have a bible. where is it?
jim polled the congregation: are these associations more positive or more negative?
  • negative
"the bible doesn't have a great rep," jim agreed.

how, then, would people be convinced of its authenticity? we offered these suggestions:
  • the person who discusses the bible should be educated and knowedgeable so that what they say is not mere opinion
  • how they lived [i'm not sure if 'they' refers to the people of the bible, or to the witnessing christians of today]
  • the death and resurrection of jesus christ
  • the old testament's claim that the world was created in seven days is not believable these days; it's a question of integrity
  • evidence of historical documents
  • geographical and archeological evidence
  • the bible is still the bestseller of all time
  • relating one's personal experience of the bible's impact
  • fulfillment of old testament prophecies
jim said all these suggestions work together. it is a question of integrity; of walking the walk and talking the talk. he recalled isaiah: "my word will not return to me empty, but will achieve the purpose for which I sent it": if it's true, it will have an effect.

quoting second timothy, jim said the bible is "god-breathed"; and quoting someone in the da vinci code, "the bible is not faxed from heaven."

the bible is the most compelling story there is. it has magnitude. it has integrity. although it is a set of books written over a thousand years, it tells a single story from beginning to end. his story. history. to illustrate this jim presented the following phrases contained within an hourglass, with the The One at the narrows. [my note: these are the players]:

C r e a t i o n
Adam & Eve
I s r a e l
Remnant
The One
Disciples
The Church
Humankind
New Creation

[my note: this is the plot that relates 1:1 with the players above]:

Relationship
Temptation
Providence
Prophecy
Kingdom
Present

Sent (The
Mission)

Body of
Christianity

V a l u e d
W h o l e


it's the integral story of god seeking us, authenticating us, transforming us into truly his image forever. the scripture addresses us as the living word. we don't have the authority to establish that it's true. rather, scripture authenticates us.

jim referred to the three parables of lost sheep, lost coin, and lost son in luke 15
he said "the lost son," or "prodigal son," could also be called "the searching father." god is searching for us.

the god code:
the real question of authenticity: are we who we need to be.
more so than cope with change, can we effect change, transformation, remaking?

more so than analyzing it, our role is to be part of the story, a story still being told.

Friday, April 28, 2006

the (im)mortal john arpin

i took my daughter tonight to see the renowned john arpin play for his home crowd at the brooklea, in a setting more intimate than a concert hall.

not only was it a special night for me and cady, but it was a special night for mr. arpin. many in the audience were people he grew up with; his brother leo was there, too. but there were many who weren't there, who had died, including "my best male friend," bud watson. john arpin (who will be 70 this year) regretted having been away so much, to miss out on friendships, and he vowed to change that.

he had composed a special piece for tonight, which he played first.

followed by a joplin rag, "easy pieces," then a phenomenal performance of "st. louis blues" by w.c. handy, and closing with a medley of richard rogers songs, which brought us to our feet.

at our table was fran, a petite, shy, elderly woman who had been his elementary school teacher.
during the intermission john arpin was surrounded by friends -- photos and hugs galore. fran hesitantly made her way over to him; i could tell this was very important to her, making this connection from over 50 years ago.

in the second set he talked at some length about his friend eubie blake, and then played a piece by eubie. and he closed with an extemporised medley of songs, that began with a joplinesque ragtime version of "here, there, and everywhere" by the beatles, (just to prove he could play something written after 1935).

john arpin closed by saying he felt a "sort of teetertotter emotion" of sadness and yet a peculiar joy. he heartfelt suggestion that we should make this a regular thing, an annual event, was of course enthusiastically received. nevertheless, for me, and i'm sure for all of us, tonight was a once in a lifetime moment.

testament

at last night's arrogant worms concert in toronto, as part of the intro to their song "jesus' brother bob," one of the worms turned to the other and greeted him:
"hey, judas!"
"hi!"
"i hear you have a new book out..."

before going down to t.o., i nipped into cottage books to see if my son was there, and while i was there i thought perhaps i'd pick up some reading material for the ride down. without going too far i spied a nino ricci book i had never heard of: testament, published in 2002. set in roman times, the first person narrator, who so far hasn't been named, hooks up with a holy man from galilee, yeshua and his growing band of disciples. my suspicion of the narrator's identity is pretty nearly confirmed on page 45, when he joins the band and becomes the treasurer. i've discovered my own gospel of judas.

eyes on the prize

from bruce springsteen's new album, a tribute to pete seeger: We Shall Overcome: The Seeger Sessions:

Paul and Silas, bound in jail
Had no money for to go their bail
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

Paul and Silas thought they was lost
Dungeon shook and the chains come off
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

Freedom's name is mighty sweet
And soon we're gonna meet
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

I got my hand on the freedom plow
Wouldn't take nothing for my journey now
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

Hold on!
Hold on!
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

The only chain that a man can stand
Is the chain of a hand on hand
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

I'm gonna board that big Greyhound
Carry me love from town to town
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

Hold on!
Hold on!
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

The only thing that I did was wrong
Stayed in the wilderness too long
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

The only thing we did was right
Was the day we decided to fight
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

Hold on!
Hold on!
Keep your eyes on the prize
Hold on!

Ain't been in Heaven but I been told
Streets up there paved with gold

Thursday, April 27, 2006

my bible and tolkein

my last post surveyed the english translations online at biblegateway.com. i did this because i'm unfamiliar with most of them, and i'm embarking on a Comprehensive Bible Reading Plan (365 Days). so far i've been reading each passage in two versions: The New International Version (NIV) and The Message.

the bible i have at home is not listed at biblegateway.com: the New Jerusalem Bible. it's a christmas gift almost 20 years ago from my mother and stepfather.

i did not know this until tonight, but the jerusalem bible translator of jonah was j.r.r. tolkein.

Monday, April 24, 2006

what a difference a word makes - Genesis 1:26-28

(note: 16 july 2006; updated with Today's New International Version).

of the two creation stories in genesis, the first strikes me as less patriarchal. nevertheless, some of the different translations online at biblegateway.com differ significantly as far as language inclusivness.

below is a table which focuses on the language used in two phrases: the gender of human beings and their stewardship of earth.

these phrases are bolded in this King James Version of Genesis 1:26:
And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
  • click the Translation to read that translation's passage of genesis 1:26-28.
  • click the Year to read that translation's version information, some of which are very illuminating.






TranslationPublished or
Copyright Year(s)
GenderStewardship
Today's New International Version 2001,2005 human beings rule over
New International Version 1973-1994 man rule over
New American Standard Bible 1960-1995 man rule over
The Message 1993-2002 human beings responsible for
Amplified Bible 1954-1987 mankind authority over
New Living Translation 1996 people masters over
King James Version 1611 man dominion over
English Standard Version 2001 man dominion over
Contemporary English Version 1995 humans rule
New King James Version 1982 man dominion over
21st Century King James Version 1994 man dominion over
American Standard Version 1901 man dominion over
Young's Literal Translation 1898 man rule over
Darby Translation 1890 man dominion over
New Life Version 1969 man be head over
Holman Christian Standard Bible 1999-2003 man rule
New International Reader's Version 1996-1998 man rule over

the da vinci code part 1 - sermon notes

(these are my notes about jim's sermon. they are not 100% accurate nor entire. you're welcome to comment and make corrections. i've added biblical and other references.)

jim began hesitatingly, aware that he broached a controversial topic, and nervous about getting this right. he stated that this novel is a work of fiction and it contains falsehoods; nevertheless, he believes god works through controversies such as the da vinci code.

but first, jim read the whole of isaiah 54:

"Sing, O barren woman,
you who never bore a child;
burst into song, shout for joy,
you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
than of her who has a husband,"
says the LORD.

2 "Enlarge the place of your tent,
stretch your tent curtains wide,
do not hold back;
lengthen your cords,
strengthen your stakes.

3 For you will spread out to the right and to the left;
your descendants will dispossess nations
and settle in their desolate cities.

4 "Do not be afraid; you will not suffer shame.
Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.

5 For your Maker is your husband—
the LORD Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.

6 The LORD will call you back
as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
only to be rejected," says your God.

7 "For a brief moment I abandoned you,
but with deep compassion I will bring you back.

8 In a surge of anger
I hid my face from you for a moment,
but with everlasting kindness
I will have compassion on you,"
says the LORD your Redeemer.

9 "To me this is like the days of Noah,
when I swore that the waters of Noah would never again cover the earth.
So now I have sworn not to be angry with you,
never to rebuke you again.

10 Though the mountains be shaken
and the hills be removed,
yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken
nor my covenant of peace be removed,"
says the LORD, who has compassion on you.

11 "O afflicted city, lashed by storms and not comforted,
I will build you with stones of turquoise, [a]
your foundations with sapphires. [b]

12 I will make your battlements of rubies,
your gates of sparkling jewels,
and all your walls of precious stones.

13 All your sons will be taught by the LORD,
and great will be your children's peace.

14 In righteousness you will be established:
Tyranny will be far from you;
you will have nothing to fear.
Terror will be far removed;
it will not come near you.

15 If anyone does attack you, it will not be my doing;
whoever attacks you will surrender to you.

16 "See, it is I who created the blacksmith
who fans the coals into flame
and forges a weapon fit for its work.
And it is I who have created the destroyer to work havoc;

17 no weapon forged against you will prevail,
and you will refute every tongue that accuses you.
This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD,
and this is their vindication from me,"
declares the LORD.

Footnotes:

1. Isaiah 54:11 The meaning of the Hebrew for this word is uncertain.
2. Isaiah 54:11 Or lapis lazuli

jim said that in the old testament, god exiled israel because they were unfaithful; and because they would not learn, because they would not listen, nations warred against israel until god finally got through to dense israel.

similarly, god uses controversial books to get through to dense 21st century humanity. the role of heresy is to sharpen and define our senses to truly experience god. these are more my words than a paraphrase of jim's. my notes of jim's words are: god uses heresy to make us examine the truth: what it is.

what makes a really good storytelling is that for a moment we suspend disbelief, we engage, we identify with the characters, we live their reality. but in the end, the truth is that a novel is not above distortion or invention in order to tell a good story. (this is my amplification of jim's point).

what it is is a fiction.

jim focused on three main points of fiction:

1. the priory of sion is a centuries-old secret society dedicated to the preservation of the secret true church. in reality, the priory of sion is a 20th century creation of pierre plantard, who "deposited a series of forged documents, the so-called Dossiers Secrets or "Secret Dossiers", at the Bibliothèque nationale de France (BnF), in Paris. Therefore, people who set out to research the 'Priory of Sion' would come across these fake documents at the BnF. One of those researchers was Henry Lincoln."

(henry lincoln went on to write holy blood, holy grail with michael baigent and richard leigh. dan brown based much of his novel on this book.)

2. jesus and mary magdalene were married. mary was pregnant at the time of his crucifixion, and, after his death, she bore their daughter, sarah, whose bloodline exists to this day. in reality, only 2 of the many gnostic gospels hint at the possibility of a special relationship between jesus and mary, and none of the canonical gospels nor acts nor epistles. jim pointed out that in 1 corinthians, 9:5, paul, himself a contemporary of jesus and in communion with christ, asks "Don't we have the right to take a believing wife along with us, as do the other apostles and the Lord's brothers and Cephas [Peter]?" it is telling that he refers to other apostles, but not to jesus himself. wouldn't jesus have been the best example had he himself been married?

3. the truth has been suppressed by the council of nicea in a close vote. in reality, the major concern of the council of nicea had nothing to do with jesus and mary, or mary at all. jesus' divinity was not questioned; it was whether jesus was co-eternal with god, (Trinitarianism) or "created by (and consequently inferior to) the Father at some point, before which the Son did not exist." (Arianism). the vote wasn't close. with about 300 bishops attending, "there were only two adherents of Arius who remained steadfast, Theonas of Marmarica in Libya, and Secundus of Ptolemais."

jim contrasted the above fictions in the novel with its embodiment of truths, two of which are:
- the christian church has suppressed the strength of the feminine
- the christian church has demonized sex

jim added that the new testament does not get distorted with every passing generation's re-telling; rather, each translation goes back to the original greek or hebrew documents. why don't we do this with the church, he wondered, go back and recover the roots of the original christian community?

jim wished to encourage a forum for discussion. tentatively, 5 or 6 people raised questions or made statements. i noted that:
- one person affirmed that dan brown professes to be an ardent christian
- one person said "the gospel is not to be debated, but to be proclaimed."

Sunday, April 23, 2006

he tells a good story

many years ago i worked on the brock university student newspaper. in the late fall we printed a letter to the editor which generated a huge response, perhaps the largest in the paper's history.

the letterwriter wasn't a student or staff member. he had come to the campus during frosh week and decided to stay for a few months. he slept in the seminar rooms, showered at the gym, ate from the tons of food left over on abandoned plates in the cafeteria, read in the library and attended lectures and events. all gratis.

now, as winter was approaching, he was on his way to warmer climes, but before leaving he wanted to thank us for our hospitality.

the strongest reaction came from the campus police, locally known as the "Brock Five-O." all of a sudden the friendly, open campus wasn't so open, or friendly anymore. you needed passes to be in the halls after 9 pm, and all the seminar rooms were locked and other restrictions were put in place. the campus police are charged with student safety and they took the matter very seriously, of course.

we got another letter in the spring from the same writer, with very good evidence (same paper, same manual typewriter, same signature), saying it was all hoax and how much the writer had enjoyed reading and watching the debate.

back in the fall, amidst all the raging debate whether this was really possible, and whether this was a hoax, i remember the university president's comment: "he tells a good story."

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

massive beauty

Simulations Take Us Inside The Mind Of Einstein

"For years scientists trying to visualize the concept of gravitational waves churned by the collision of black holes have relied largely on artists' conceptions. Now, at long last, they have Einstein's conception.



"According to Einstein, when two massive black holes merge, all of space jiggles like a bowl of Jell-O as gravitational waves race out from the collision at light speed. This is a mind-boggling notion, to be sure.

"NASA scientists have reached a breakthrough in computer modeling that allows them to simulate what gravitational waves from merging black holes look like. The three-dimensional simulations are a manifestation of Einstein's equations, pure and simple. And they are the largest astrophysical calculations ever performed on a NASA supercomputer."

Read more: Simulations Take Us Inside The Mind Of Einstein

Watch the clip: NASA video clip of two black holes merging..

Sunday, April 16, 2006

my most beautiful day

this is my 44th easter. it has been a beautiful day. my most beautiful day.

the gospel reading brought me to tears: the experience of mary as the first one to experience the risen christ, her passion for jesus, and his direct, personal communication with her. jesus calls her by her name, "mary," he says, and that's how she recognizes him, which seems very intimate to me. "don't hold on to me... go tell my brothers: 'i am returning to my father and your father, to my god and your god.'"

mary is the first to be charged with relating the experience of the risen christ. i find this passage even more moving today as i am still under the effect of reading the bulk of the da vinci code yesterday.

i was further moved by jim's sermon. i have never heard such a sermon before in my life. "this is not a book of rules," he said, holding up the holy bible, "it's people's experiences of god."

i wrote earlier about my dissatisfaction with logical proofs of god. today i write about my joy of the experiential proofs of god. starting with mary and the disciples: what could possibly motivate, asked jim, a scattered, fugutive, leaderless group to go out into the world (in the coming years and decades and eventually suffer torture and death for their evangelism), but the experience of the risen jesus?

i offer no proofs myself, only my own experiences, modest and minor. jim charged us to look to our own experiences, to find the living, dynamic word and ourselves be alive and be dynamic, like jesus. and because we are the church, (and the church is not some slow-moving institution made of sticks and stones) jim has charged the church to be dynamic, to be at the forefront of change, to effect change, for heaven's sake.

i can't do the sermon justice. you had to be there. i hope i got these snppets mostly right.

before the service, i sat next to a woman who hadn't been to church all year. she said she wouldn't tell me her age, but she held a copy of the pioneer camp catalog and said she had gone to pioneer camp 66 years ago. she said that while misses the old hymns, she thinks this contemporary setting is the right thing for the church.

after sue was kind enough to give me a lift home with all my musical gear, i called wes, who was dogsitting at his mother's, and arranged to have brunch with him. i packed my sack and put my banjo around my neck, walked down to tim horton's and up to see my son, playing "lord of the dance" all the way. well, practicing it, actually, but by the time i got to karen's, it was good enough to call playing.

wes met me at the door, spied the banjo, and groaned: "you've brought the devil's ax." i promised not to play it in the house.

i made brunch: scrambled eggs topped with salsa, with buttered homemade whole wheat bread on the side, and wes and i ate in the kitchen. i asked wes if he had read the da vinci code (he hasn't yet, but i gathered that he had a good idea what it's about), and i said it's the topic of the next two sermons. wes asked me if i'm a christian now, and i said yes, and he groaned again, and i thought: this conversation is going to last two minutes.

it lasted two hours. i think it's the first adult conversation i've had with my son. if anyone's reading this who doesn't know wes and how significant this is, not only is he a typical, self-absorbed, benignly rebellious teenager who knows everything and has humanity and divinity basically figured out and thinks he's an atheist, he has, due to his asperger's syndrome, a very narrow scope of interest, and if the topic doesn't have to do with dungeons and dragons or star trek, it won't hold his attention for very long. people with asperger's syndrome also tend to be all output; they do all the talking and aren't interested in what others think. or say. or feel. but this was an actual discussion, a dialogue, and not just about ideas, but also about my experience of god. wes heard me. he was engaged.

incredible.

oh, by the way. i broke my promise. i absentmindedly picked up my banjo and quietly played intermittently while wes and i discoursed. he never seemed to notice.

i went home, grabbed my bass, and headed to the farquhar's 17th annual easter egg hunt (my first), where blind mary played a small set, augmented by kelly lefaive on fiddle and her dad on spoons and shakers, and ted from down east, who was new to everybody, sitting in on guitar.

home again home again jiggedy jig. dishes done. floor swept. blog written. now to bed to finish the the da vinci code, which i'm finding extraordinarily relevant to my life.

post-script: so, i don't know if wes will come to listen to the da vinci code sermons, but i just spoke with karen, who has read the novel, and she's interested and she'll probably attend with at least our youngest daughter.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

fullness

i talked with my sister tonight. she has done alpha and led it a couple of times. she also said that their communion service has a 1,000 people attending.

i have wrongfully mocked her church for its ampitheatre-like setting. peg, i beg your forgiveness. my association has been that big church = big business = worldly power and wealth = lack of intimacy with jesus and community. it's not my church, so i don't know what i'm talking about. and who am i to judge a thousand people's spirituality, or even one?

would it be wonderful if our church was full, including that balcony that sweeps above the back third of the church? katrina and i talked today of growth and change: what if our pastor leaves? how do we grow a younger generation into leadership? but we didn't talk about the challenge of growth of the number of members. maybe my sister has some insights.

Friday, April 14, 2006

lost and found

my sister said i might like these guys:

Q: DID YOU REALLY RIDE BICYCLES AROUND THE COUNTRY?

A: Yes, we did. We left from Niagara Falls, Ontario in September 1986 and returned there in August of 1987. During the trip we rode basically from New York to St. Louis to Miami to San Diego to Seattle and back to New York. It took us 340 days and we played 270 concerts at schools, churches, camps, or any place that would have us. We stayed with families 300 nights and in hotels the other 30. One thing about us: we do not camp. (It's just our nature.) We made the trip without ever missing a concert date and without any support vehicle following us or leading us. We supported ourselves through the sale of our first record (vinyl only at the time). Lots of days we just bungee-corded the records to our bikes and brought them along to the gigs to offer for sale. It was an incredible experience to say the least, and I think that's about what we have said on this subject isn't it?

i think she meant their music: lost and found

sex. and christianity.

sex. and christianity. sex and the single person and christianity. i'm a divorced heterosexual. by my definition, i'm not promiscuous. i have had sex only within the bounds of committed, monogamous, loving relationships.

but the relationships haven't lasted, and perhaps 'commitment' has been the telling point. committed to what? being committed to the other person hasn't been enough to make the relationship last.

my experience has been that each person in the relationship changes, and rightfully so: changes to become more authentic and to achieve a truer understanding of the self. but that hasn't work towards a mutual commitment; just the opposite, because it's inevitable that each person changes differently: if you roll two dice, most of the time they'll come out as two different numbers, and to be able to roll doubles consistently is, well, miraculous. or else the dice are fixed.

nicky gumble gives the analogy of a christian marriage as a pyramid with each person on either side of the base and god at the apex. as each person moves up the sides of the pyramid towards god, they move closer together. here, of course, 'commitment' involves commitment to jesus, and all else follows.

i don't expect christian commitment in a relationship makes it any easier; it's not a panacea for human frailties; in fact, i expect it produces greater challenges, but i also expect it comes with a promise of greater truth and love and joy. i've seen christian marriages fail; i've seen non-christian marriages succeed.

but i've made my choice to follow god, and that redefines my idea of a 'committed' relationship. on the other hand, i haven't made my choice yet whether i want a relationship with a woman again. i have a lot to sort out for myself, i have children who need my support. i have a deeper yearning that i need to understand. maybe it's time to be intentionally celibate for a while and let that sexual energy serve another purpose.

my birth day

i was born on good friday (20 april 1962). today's good friday service was very powerful. i went for a l-o-o-n-g walk this afternoon and then borrowed the da vinci code from katrina. we sat outside on the trampoline and talked mostly about our lives in context of the last alpha video. i wish the scotsman was feeling better so he could've joined us, and also so that he could have enjoyed the beautiful day. i was looking forward to canasta or euchre and schnick-schnacks and conversation; so we'll have to go for a pint when he's not feeling under the weather. when katrina invited me to knox 5 weeks ago, i thought to myself i'd see it through to easter. now that i've accepted god back into my life, i'll stay at knox until god wants me to serve some other purpose. how will i know when that is? i don't know; i'm here to learn how to listen. i finally told my mother and sister the good news, which of course made them very happy. and i'm very happy too. i want to thank you all and i want to thank jesus.

what would jesus do

i used to make fun of 'wwjd' -- i think my favourite parody was: 'wwgd' -- what would gretzky do? my sister and her husband -- peggy and jack -- wore wwjd wrist bands and other stuff. i would still make fun of something that was mass marketed to the point of cliche.

nevertheless, i've always been mindful of what jesus might do. it's scary, because i can't imagine jesus living a conventional life and doing things like driving a minivan. (well, no, actually, it's funny, cuz i can imagine jesus driving a minivan; he's got peter, andrew, james, john, matthew, and philip with him, and judas is driving the other one, with thomas, james, simon, batholomew, and thaddaeus. i think they're on their way to a grateful dead concert.)

what would jesus do? something radical -- but not rash, as jim mentioned in last week's sermon. something radical, like be fully human and fully serve god. jesus spent nearly 30 years preparing for his ministry, preparing for the event we celebrate this weekend.

but the years have passed since 'wwjd' was all the rage, and in this clip, context is everything. this clip was posted by one of my lj friends.
http://peacetakescourage.cf.huffingtonpost.com/

p.s.
if, after the animation, you go to the website, you can click "About" to find who's the rabblerouser behind all this (if you believe anything on the web; i know i do.).

Monday, April 10, 2006

every day is christmas day

i just found this song.

Rudy
by Be Good Tanyas


Rudy lives on the borderline
Between civilization and basic survival
And the summertime treats him fairly well
But the wintertime is a dirty cold rival.
It's wintertime now in Georgetown,
The streets come alive with the Christmas light
And Rudy sleeps on a warm air grate,
With a newspaper blanket on December nights.

Deck the halls,
Rudolph the red-nosed wino
Knows it's Christmas time.
Jingle Bells and Christmas shoppers
Dashing through the snow.
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Who've found it in your hearts
To flip Rudy a fin
And I'll be home for Christmas,
But this man has
No place to go.

Christmas has a meaning in it all
To people of greed and incredible waste,
They seek the deeper meaning
In the shopping mall,
In a yuletide spirit
Of impatience and hate.
Rudy is a patient man,
Who tries to see the beauty in everything.
Yes, and not a very demanding soul,
Whose only wish is
To live until the Spring.

Nobody knows the reasons why
Things turn out
Like the way they do.
And there ain't no one who can tell you
The reasons why
There's fortunate folks
Like me and you.

Rudy must have people somewhere,
Who wonder what
Became of the man.
And Rudy must wonder
The same damn thing
As the crowd passes by
And he sticks out his hand.

Deck the halls,
Rudolph the red-nosed wino
Knows it's Christmas time.
Jingle Bells and Christmas shoppers
Dashing through the snow.
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Who have found it in your hearts
To flip Rudy a fin,
And I'll be home for Christmas,
But this man has
No place to go.

Rudy died on the borderline,
Of a civilized world
On Christmas Eve.
You know the shoppers shopped,
And the temperatures dropped,
On a man whose absence
Won't be grieved.
Peace on the soul of the cop
Who found him in a booth
With his hand froze to a telephone.
You know, I think I know
Who he had on the line,
And Rudy won't spend
This Christmas alone.

Deck the halls,
Rudolph the red-nosed wino
Knows it's Christmas time.
Jingle Bells and Christmas shoppers
Dashing through the snow.
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Who have found it in your hearts
To flip Rudy a fin,
And I'll be home for Christmas,
And this year,
Rudy gets to go.
Yeah, and I'll be home for Christmas.
And this year, Rudy gets to go.

Saturday, April 08, 2006

primary sources

if anyone's reading this, pardon me that i'm brief. it's very late and i know soon i'll be too tired to be coherent.

a few days ago i finished Programming The Universe: A Quantum Computer Scientist Takes On The Cosmos and as soon as i finished it, i wanted to read it again.

but i have another book waiting to be read, one which promises a lot about revealing truths about jesus: The Pagan Christ: Recovering The Lost Light by Tom Harpur. i read the first chapter or so with some incredulity but nonetheless with great excitement. 20 years or so ago i read harpur's columns in the toronto star, and at least one of his books, For Christ's Sake; he comes with impressive credentials, and like me, an Anglican background. i trusted him, and was willing to suspend disbelief while i read his new (published in 2004) book (note: parts of the book were originally published as newspaper columns in the preceding year or two). i felt i had begun a great intellectual journey that night, a journey onto new spiritual truths, even that i had discovered my purpose: to explore this idea of jesus as the pagan christ.

the next day (thursday), i googled the book. it's been over a year since its publication. what has been the critical reaction to it? the first search result is a dissenting article. this article at times is vitrolic, which puts me off, but it claims two merits: it researches each of harpur's points, and at the end it engages harpur himself via email.

personally, before i can make a final decision, there is much left to be studied: i have to read harpur's book, confirm his sources, and read the book's supporters and dissenters. but the dissenting article has thrown cold water into my face. it accuses harpur, with evidence, of sloppy research, of lacking primary sources. i won't say any more until i'm done, but i'll be reading more critically. and i'll post my further thoughts.

today another document, perhaps as incredulous, came my way, "The Gospel of Judas," which purports that jesus asked judas to betray him. the difference here from harpur's book, is that there is primary source, the copy of which is 1700 years old (and the original text is known to have existed since at least 180 a.d.). at this time i'm not interested in the truth of it; i know too little to be a good judge. i'm interested to see how this is received and evaluated over time. the other difference from the harpur book is that this primary source is published, not by the daily/weekly popular press, but by an academic organization: national geographic.

as for primary sources, (a) may god give me guidance, and (b) i'm reading the new testament, again. maybe one day i'll dust off my koine greek and read it in the original. if any one in midland wants to join me, drop me an email.

Friday, April 07, 2006

fibs

from GottaBook:

One
Small,
Precise,
Poetic,
Spiraling mixture:
Math plus poetry yields the Fib.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

listen to the music

i could be the most virtuosic guitar player in the world, but if i couldn't listen, i'd hardly be a musician. i'm a very modest guitar player; most people i play with are much more talented, and that includes my students. but i know that because i listen, i'm a capable musician. i try to listen with all my being, because the music is always happening, and always happening at all levels in all ways. listen to the drums, listen to the bass, listen to the guitar and keys, listen to the singers, listen to the sound tech, listen to the audience, listen to the groove, listen to the mood, listen to what's going on inside me, listen to my intuition, listen to my muse, listen to the people, listen to the walls and halls and bricks and beams, listen to the birds and traffic, listen to the rain and listen to the sunshine, listen to the colours and the smells. listen to my children and family, my friends, my enemies. listen to you. listen to me. listen to god. listen, we are all musicians. i know of no greater joy.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

communion

ok, next in the continuing adventure of discovering protestantism (as opposed to anglicanism, even low-church anglicanism), is... communion! there are many formal and liturgical differences (which i won't list here).

but the essence remains, and that greatly moved me. i at times had tears in the corners of my eyes, as i felt i haven't felt in perhaps a quarter century.

notes: i did locate the baptismal font, today, in behind the drum kit. the music was really good today, and i wondered: if i joined them and they would have me, would i (have to) wear a goatee ;) ?

the new testament exegesis (? -- as i've said before, it's not really a sermon) tells me how little i've read and understood the epistles. we came to the famous section where paul says that wives should obey their husbands, and i thought to myself, now, how's jim gonna handle this? with humour, first of all ("i wanted this in our wedding vows, but melissa wouldn't go for it"); and then with context ("women were property"); and finally with revelation ("it was a radical idea that husbands should love their wives as their own bodies"). jim's modern take on impure love is love that objectifies the other.

here are today's two synchronicities. when i got home i put on some music for my brunch guests. i chose a mix tape i had made a few years before. the mix tape itself had no theme when it was made; it was just the songs we were listening to that summer. these two songs were back-to-back on the tape; in the first song, hawksley workman expresses how i felt during communion, and in the second, sarah harmer sings of consecrated love.

Sweet Hallelujah
by Hawksley Workman
from For Him and the Girls

This is just a prayer for those who need one
There's a little church I know in the dale
Where they sing a song so sweet, to my saviour who is calling me
Sweet, sweet, I just have to breathe hallelujah, sweet hallelujah.

I'll meet you before the dew has left the fern leaves
We'll listen together as the bell rings from the dale
and it summons me with a sound so sweet, like my saviour who is calling me
Sweet, sweet, I just have to sing hallelujah, sweet hallelujah

And there is none so fine a place to greet him
To dance before the morning sun is to please him
To dance a dance so gracefully, to praise the man so clumsily
Sweet, sweet, I just have to dance hallelujah, sweet hallelujah


Open Window
by Sarah Harmer
from You Were Here

Love, I see you there
Adrift on the air
Floating by the open window

Ah, the sentiment of love
Reflections that speak of
What can enter when our hearts are open

Here, witnesses appear
And recognize how sacred love can be when stated
Shared, shown for all to see
The beauty that can be when love is cultivated

Well our love is a sacred thing
Like the mysteries of the night
In the darkness unwavering
And still so strong come the light

Well our love is an infinite thing
Like the sun's last ray on the sea
As it sets low in the west
And the moon rises

Saturday, April 01, 2006

terar dum prosim

i read tonight's open journal before doing the dishes, so that i'd have something to contemplate while doing the dishes, but that was hours ago and i can't recall all that i wanted to write about.

i've been in a few car accidents. i was the driver in every one of them. sober every time. only one of them involved a collision with another vehicle. no one's ever been hurt, including me. but there have been some close calls. after the last one, about 20 months ago, i gave up driving.

the two most amazing ones involved ice and rear-drive vehicles. in the first one, north of lake superior, i rolled a jeep down an embankment. it landed on its wheels. after i checked for fluid leaks, i put the jeep into 4-wheel drive, drove it up the snowy embankment, and back to the opp station in whiteriver.

the other amazing one was on the 400 southbound going through barrie approaching the anne street overpass. the car fishtailed and shot off the road. the last thing i saw before the snow flew over the windshield was the telephone pole coming straight for me. i remember calmly saying, "Oh well." the car somehow missed the telephone pole, slid up the side of the overpass embankment, then slid backdown and came to rest against the inside of the guardrail. the width of the gap between the telephone pole and the guard rail at that time through which the car had shot was only a few metres, maybe 3 or 4.

i've been lucky so many times. and those are the accidents or near misses that are obvious to me. what about the ones i don't know about, the ones where had i done something a moment sooner or a moment later... ?

dumb luck? first of all, i think somebody's been trying to tell me something: "you shouldn't be driving." but maybe somebody's also saying, "not so fast. i'm not done with you yet." maybe, because i keep asking what i should be doing in this universe, to best serve it, somebody's saying, "you haven't got the answer yet." i don't know. i don't presume to know how god works. i wouldn't know a miracle if it hit me in the face.

about a year ago, my cousin-in-law suddenly ended up in hospital in hamilton, with leukemia. all her platelets, her white blood cells, everything was gone. she was given 24 hours left to live. she stayed like that for weeks. there were vigils, there were intercessions. i didn't pray, but i wrote her a poem. in an email last week, her husband, my first cousin, wrote very humourously of how last week they spent her 44th birthday going to 6 or 7 medical exams, how she's almost fully recovered and will be off meds in the next month or two. at the hospital they call her the miracle girl. she set some kind of record for being so close to death's door for so long.

a jungian analyst once told me that all the people i dream about are not those people, but facets of me, and what do i see of myself in those facets? a friend and counselor once told me that my son, who has aspergers syndrome, is there to serve a purpose in my life. by extension, i wonder, does everybody serve a purpose in my life; does everybody serve my purpose? and the corollary: do i serve a purpose in everybody else's life? do we all serve each other, in one way or another, whether we like it or not? ("it's not an option.")

my high school motto is: terar dum prosim, which means: may i be consumed in service. the school is named after bishop nicholas ridley, who was burned at the stake in tudor england (that's him being burned at the beginning of the film Elizabeth).